touched

some of my friends and i went to the beach last night. we played in the water and got our feet really dirty with sand. we came home and i looked at my feet. it was so filthy with sand stuck between my toes. with my head down, i said, "i wanna wash my feet..." one of my friends heard me and said, "come outside. we'll wash our feet." jokingly, i asked, "wanna wash my feet? you know, like, how Jesus washed his disciples' feet?" my friend didn't reply but instead, he went into his room and brought out a white bottle of something. i didn't know what the bottle was for but i just followed him outside to the backyard. he told me to sit on the wooden chair and insisted that i sit on it. ignoring my protests and whining (i really, really was just joking!), he made me sit down. so, i sat down and watched him wash my feet with the hose. the white bottle was soap! he washed my feet not just with water but with soap, too. he also dried my feet with his one towel he had left. the rest of his towels were in the laundry. i was so very touched... after he was done, i told him i'd wash his feet, too, but he wouldn't let me and told me to go back inside the house. haha, dang, i felt like a kid.

this same brother teases me A LOT. he shoots me with a bb gun (i have so many bruises), scares me every chance he gets (my b.p is so high now), and makes me smell his stinky feet and armpits and burps (gross!!!!). but beyond all his pranks and jokes, he can be, dare i say, fairly sweet :) what he did last night... i will never forget it.

When He had finished washing their feet, He put on His clothes and returned to His place. "Do you understand what I have done for you?" He asked them. "You call me 'Teacher' and 'Lord,' and rightly so, for that is what I am. Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another's feet. I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you. Very truly I tell you, no servant is greater than his master, nor is a messenger greater than the one who sent him. Now that you know these things, you will be blessed if you do them. -- John 13:12-17

so here's an update

i don't really have much to write about. my previous posts have been dry and somber. but i really do miss writing in here, and though i have nothing out-of-the-ordinary/funny/inspiring to say... i'm just going to give an update. this is kind of my way of replying to emails that i have yet to respond to (sorry for the late replies! i WILL write back, i promise).

-- it's hard to see people come and go. within the past 2 weeks, 2 of my favorite brothers from church have left to go to their respective places. before these guys came along, i had no genuine friendship with a church brother. but after becoming good friends with them, i was able to experience and learn so much from them. it makes me sad that they've left san diego, but i'm also excited to see what God has in store for them. i hope that this phrase, "out of sight, out of mind" will not come true; rather, i hope we'll still keep in touch.

-- p90x is going pretty well. this is my 6th week. my arms and legs are becoming tighter but i really wish i could see a change in my stomach :( where are you, abs?! haha, anyways. dude, working out is awesome. not only does it feel good, but it also helps me mentally. my fear of doing anything athletic has lessened, too! i can now ride a skateboard and not be afraid to fall!! anddd i'm starting to like playing sports. haha dangg.. the only thing i still don't like is running. bleh.

-- i set a punishment for myself. if i'm unable to achieve this one particular goal by next june, then as a punishment, i'm going to move back home. i really don't want to live with my parents in a place where i have no accountability, no church... the old selena might resurface again and that will definitely not be a pretty sight. so, i'm really worried. but i guess this is why it's a punishment.

-- my spiritual walk needs a lot of work. i think i've just been kind of stuck at this one point. i know i'm not falling away, but i'm also not growing. i've been lazy and perhaps this is why everything else in my life has been kind of whatevers. no passion. no drive. no zeal.

-- too many girls around me want to get married right now. dang. just thinking about marriage terrifies me a lot, a lot. even just listening to these girls talk about it scares me. *shudder* i still feel like i'm too young... but my biological clock says otherwise.

that's it for my update. i can't believe it's already november...~

p90x

for a girl who hated p.e. back in the old days, i'm pretty proud of myself for being consistent with this rigorous training program. 90 days filled with various exercise techniques. me?! haha, yes.

this upcoming week will be my 4th week. i'm motivated to complete all 13 weeks (not sure what i'm going to do about the holidays but i'll try my best to not miss a single day). the program is definitely not easy, but it's a great stress-reliever. and boy, it feels super good after the workout. it gives me joy when a bead of salty sweat drips off my face because it shows that i'm really working hard.

if i can be motivated to do something that i've always disliked (ie. exercises), then surely i can find motivation to work hard in all aspects of my life. right? right.